Destiny’s Manifesto

Over the past few days I’ve been writing the biographical part of what will become my manifesto. It’s a useful exercise in that it achieves two goals. It shows you where you’ve been and it shows you what matters most. What matters most defines your core values. Your core values are the compass by which you navigate life. Being clear about those values is helpful, especially when wading through the murky and unclear waters that often comprise our lives “right now.” Hindsight is good but only after the fact and in the midst of a struggle a sense of bearing… Read More »

I Was A College Dropout

Hey there , I never graduated college. I had every intention of doing so when I started out. In fact I was what my wife affectionately refers to as a “schoolie.” I finished high school near the top of my class, with an “Advanced” diploma, AP classes, college credit and a solid GPA. My first college class was Sociology 101. I took it from 8 to 12 on Saturdays, the second semester of my senior year. I entered college a member of the school’s Honors Program, again pursuing an advanced degree. I was a History major. There was only one… Read More »

A Million Little Pieces

Hey there , Back in January of 2005, the first month of my sobriety, I read a book, A Million Little Pieces, by James Frey. Frey and his book had just been rocketed to instant celebrity by a gushing testimonial by Oprah over how much she loved the book and how badly each and every one of us needed to read it. Just as quickly as he ascended he crashed and burned. His book, published as a memoir of his experience in rehab was revealed to be an elaborate exaggeration. Oprah rescinded her endorsement and he was publicly eviscerated, drawn… Read More »

“Everything Happens for a Reason”

Hey there, On Friday I shared a bit of my history and that pivotal moment in my life when I decided to stop using drugs. There is a cliché that’s often bandied about in self-help and get-off-your-ass-and-do-something circles and that is, “Everything happens for a reason.” What we most often take from this is that there is some divine plan at work; that we are a part of a bigger scheme devised by God, or the Universe, or whatever name you choose to describe the force that drives what we know as reality. There’s comfort in the idea that someone… Read More »

Clean and Sober

Hey there, For a good ten years I was a drug addict.  I was a “recreational user” for longer than that but by addict I mean I was daily user — for ten years. I stopped seven years, nine months and 27 days ago. New Year’s Day, 2005 ranks, along with the day Samantha and I snuck off and eloped and the days my three daughters were born, as one of the most important days of my life.  It was the day I decided I was bigger than my problems and that I didn’t need an external salve to make… Read More »

Strengthology Lessons

Hey there , Yesterday I spoke about how we are all perfectly imperfect.  This was an epiphany I gleaned from my weekend in St. Petersburg at Elliott Hulses’ Strengthology Workshop. The way this epiphany came, however, was not the usual flash of insight that is accompanied by excitement and a rush of good feeling.  In fact, it came up slowly, on my blind side, and when I first became aware of it, my first response was, “Aww, really?” Elliott’s workshop was on what he calls the Fourth Layer of Strength — presentable strength.  It’s the ability to showcase your unique… Read More »